Sunday, August 19, 2007

OK

Is it so wrong to be happy?

He decided that he did not want to marry me. He broke up with me. I am okay with that. I don't need to apologize for being okay. I don't need to feel guilty for being okay.

Sure, sometimes, I feel really down (particularly after hearing a song that maybe is on that CD or watching way too many romantic comedies) and I think of what might have been. But when I do this, I'm thinking of some false ideal relationship that never really was and not of the two miserable people trying to hold up crumbling walls.

I have this awful tendency to give up things I love doing to make other people happy. It's not the other person's fault; it's mine. But now? Now I can do them. I'm enjoying life, that's no lie. I've filled up my schedule, not to keep myself so busy that I cannot think, but rather because I have all this free time and all these neglected friends.

I chopped off all my hair because I thought I needed a change. I miss my long hair.

And anyway, as a lady at church said: "This just means that God has someone even better for you!" And that's true. That's true for me; that's true for him; and yes, that's even true for you.

God has a plan in my life and I've realized that His plan is different from what I had in mind. And you know what? That is okay. I'm not cold hearted. I prayed and prayed, just like last time (when God said 'yes'). Well, this time God said 'no,' but he gave me peace about what is happening in my life right now. God is orchestrating my life and who am I to say that the Great Composer has got it wrong?

If you are bold enough to accuse me of something, try and know my heart a little better first.

♥, Tiffany Anne

6 comments:

Tokyo Pink said...

sorry I couldn't talk last night. Anyway, you rokk girl. I think you're FINE. Don't listen to those people!

Anonymous said...

perhaps if you have a problem with this person, you should confront them rather than just ranting about it online. mike-
ps. no there's nothing wrong with being happy, in fact that's very cool.

Miscellaneous From Missy said...

I haven't been reading for a long time, but here I am today, and I'm GLAD YOU'RE HAPPY!

God is always awesome. No matter what! :-)

Milwaukee Girl said...

There's nothing wrong with being happy, nor is there anything wrong with coming to terms with the death of a relationship (or a quick judgment to slice off all your hair). There will be someone that you meet that makes your heart patter and your toes pop.

And there's nothing wrong with waiting for that either.

And Anonymous - it seems like she did talk to them. Tiff, let it out here!

Anonymous said...

This reminds me of a song. Cumbersome by Seven Mary Three. I don't know if it fits the post, but that was a really great song. In fact, I'm going to have to dig that cd out tonight.... AWESOME!

Anonymous said...

And your new haircut looks great!

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